The Birthday Boy


This past week Ol’ Dutch celebrated another one of those pesky days that thankfully come along only once a year. Yep, you guessed it. Another birthday rolled around and right on past like a freight train off a washed-out bridge. And I see that most of you missed it as I didn't see you at the party nor did you send an appropriate gift to the house. Which I guess is my fault for not announcing the whole affair so you could come and honor so great a guest as me.

We had a small celebration and Uncle Sigh and Miss Candy were kind enough to host it at their house with a few friends. And yes, I do have friends as hard as that may be to digest. But any who, Miss Candy whipped up about 2 gallons of homemade ice cream and Ol’ Dutch did his best to consume the lion's share of that, having skipped meals all day just for the occasion. Because if you have never tasted her vanilla laced fluffy white ice cream goodness you cannot imagine just how scrumptious that is.

No gifts were exchanged except for a trout shaped cookie from Uncle Sigh’s daughter Mountain Momma and some hearing aid batteries from my dear old friend Roy Rogers. And when that was opened let me tell you an applause erupted from the crowd as they are all tired of Ol’ Dutch going around deaf as a post and saying “huh” to every conversation. I think Roy got them free somewhere, but they always say it's the thought that counts. Right? But regardless of where he got them, I sure appreciate having them and being able to hear at least half of the conversations around me.

A lot of people suffer from hearing loss for a variety of reasons, some of which are avoidable. Ol’ Dutch worked for the railroad in a previous life and 2.3 million miles on a locomotive without hearing protection took its toll. Of course, way back when I was working on the rails, no one thought of hearing protection as we built the transcontinental railroad across the country. And the final nail in the proverbial coffin was probably from the noise as I drove the Golden Spike in the last rail at Promontory Utah way back in 1869. At least that is how old Miss Trixie thinks I am.

And of late, my old body has felt that old as the creaks and groans seem to increase on a daily basis. But Ol’ Dutch is just like a one-legged man and still kicking so all is not lost yet. As a matter of fact, just yesterday I was able to visit my elk blind up around 11,000 feet in elevation and did just fine. I guess if you consider some huffing and puffing fine then I did good. But I made it up there and back down without incident and was proud as a peacock in heat about that accomplishment and didn't end up as dead as a dodo to boot.

Miss Trixie is off for some big adventures today working for Mountain Man Rafting/Narrow Ridge Outdoors and so Ol’ Dutch is left to his own devices. Which means I don't know what to do all day nor how to do it without her instructions to guide me through the hours.

I am not sure I will make it honestly as it's been so long since I had to make any decision, but I will try and get by the best I can until she returns and barks out some new orders for me to follow. And since she is working all day today that means that preparing supper falls to Ol’ Dutch and I have it all planned out to a tee. I chose the easy route of course and plan to take her out for a three-course meal at Creede Bingo for hotdogs, popcorn and maybe, just maybe if she wins, some ice cream at halftime.

Never let it be said that Ol’ Dutch is not romantic. Miss Trixie will attest that is my middle name.


Kevin Kirkpatrick and his Yorkie, Cooper, fish, hunt, ATV, or hike daily. His email is Additional news can be found at